Side-eyes and stillness

Teddy has gotten some great hand-me-down toys from both sides of the family. I remember playing with this bubble maker when my nephew, Tyler, was about Teddy's age. Tyler loved this thing.

Teddy? Gave it the side eye and wasn't quite sure what to make of it.

Ah well. The continued staring allowed me to get this (perfectly focused) shot of my little boys face. Doesn't he look so still in this picture?! So rare these day.

Thankful Thursday

For late night walks from the train with no coat

For after-dinner bath time splashes

For sharing a lunch of mac and cheese with the baby

For Elmo in the morning

For the first moments of the day to myself

Transitioning

Teddy will soon be "transitioning" into the toddler room at daycare. Today at drop off I was presented with his "transitioning" schedule. Over the course of two weeks (since he is there only part time) he will spend increasing amounts of time in the big boy toddler room.

As I waved bye to my little guy, blew him a kiss, and stepped into the sunshine with these papers in my hand I found my stomach in knots. Ohmygosh a new room! Kids that are bigger and older and stronger than him. Kids that he doesn't know. Teachers that have never met him. Toys he has never seen before. A routine that will be imposed on him. I won't be able to be with him during these few hours of "transitioning." He will have to do it on his own. I was near tears as I thought about my little boy, alone in a big new world.

It got me thinking about all the coming transitions to which I will witness in his life. Next week he will step into a new room in the day care. In a few years he'll board a school bus. A few years later he'll drive away in one of our cars. A few more years and he'll graduate, ready to take on a big new world.
 
This is how a mom's heart spins - from the toddler room to dorm room all in a millisecond. And each transition will be increasingly his own. I will be more and more in the background, a cheerleader in the shadows. It's times like these that I am reminded - I carried his heart. He twisted and rolled inside me. I kept him safe only as long as it took to allow him to enter a big new world. Like probably all the other mothers out there, I just hope the world is kind to him.

Thankful Thursday

For workout videos

For white, puffy clouds

For plastic bowls (and plates and spoons and forks and cups)

For little boy giggles

For mail (electronic and snail)

Random thoughts on being critical

Children need models more than they need critics.

 JOSEPH JOUBERT, Pensées

Remembering that children benefit from hearing "yes" (or praise or positive encouragement) more often than they hear "no" is easy. The ability to make that happen on any given day? Not so easy. In an effort not to dwell on my own shortcomings, maybe I should also try to catch myself doing this parenting thing well just as often as I catch myself responding in a way I wish I hadn't. Because really, don't we all need models more than critics (including those that eat away at us internally)?

17 Months & Things

1. You had your first real illness this month. I now understand the phenomenon of "sick cuddles."
2. Your love of wheels continues, but now is more focused on trucks. Backhoes and crane trucks and concrete mixers, oh my!
3. There are some gnarly looking bumps on your gums - more teeth are in your future.
4. Coloring (and "cayons") is a new fave activity; as is dumping all the "cayons" out of their container.
5. You say "thank you" (which sounds like "take you" or sometimes "thnkyou") after I hand you a book you are wanting or your milk from the fridge or the waffle from the toaster. You know, the important things.
6. You usually scream when we have to end bath time.

Xylophone call

7. Elmo is a new favorite as well. You call him "momo" or sometimes "mama." I take offense only when I'm having a bad hair day.
8. I can tell full-on tantrums are just around the corner - the other day (after leaving the library - oh! the! horror!) you mastered the stiff-back-straight-legs-I-will-not-sit-in-this-carseat maneuver that I've heard is a toddler tantrum weapon.
9. Also? You are starting to not want to hold my hand while in the street, parking lots, or other public places. Oh your growing independence! Oh my soon-to-be greying hair!
10. You are fun to be around. No, really! You give me such a perfect excuse to run around the house screaming.
11. You are loving nursery rhymes and short songs and are starting to imitate my movements to these songs. It's pretty funny to see you wag your little finger as I say "And the doctor said, 'No more monkeys jumping on the bed!'"
12. Sometimes, usually when we need it the most, you will catch my eye and slowly smile your devilishly handsome smile (that I know you got from your father). And I will laugh, and you will too. And it makes whatever is happening a bit more palatable.
13. You love feeding me whatever you are eating, as well as my morning oatmeal.

14. We spend a good portion of our days reading books or driving cars and trucks around on the ground.
15. Most days you insist on sweeping. "Boom! Boom!" you say, and point to the closet where two brooms are kept. You are not content to just sweep by yourself while I relax on the couch. Oh no, you want me sweeping too. Our floors are pretty clean these days.
16. Dance parties are a regular occurrence. You do this awesome spin move where you hold your hand over your head ballerina-style. It cracks me up.
17. You really want to jump, but your feet have not left the ground yet. But they will, little one. One day you will jump high and run far and love deeply. And I will keep cheering you on.

Thankful Thursday

For deep breaths

For 9%

For brooms

For breaks

For bedtimes