Little one is growing up so fast! So cliche but so true. (Excuse the high-pitched mommy voice at the beginning - I realize no one finds that cute, probably not even Teddy.)
24 February 2011
23 February 2011
I am a stereotype
Woman of average height and build, short hair, wearing snow boots and a Columbia fleece jacket circa 1995. Pushing a stroller with young infant nestled inside and diaper bag hanging from the handle up to the library check-out counter.
The hint of dark circles under the eyes.
A stack of a half dozen books to be borrowed. Titles? "Baby Sleep Guide," "Take Charge of Your Child's Sleep," Sleeping Through the Night," and "In Search of Sleep" to name a few.
The hint of dark circles under the eyes.
A stack of a half dozen books to be borrowed. Titles? "Baby Sleep Guide," "Take Charge of Your Child's Sleep," Sleeping Through the Night," and "In Search of Sleep" to name a few.
22 February 2011
Righting the chaos
I'm quiet and still. It's 12:15, and I've already had lunch and gone for a 3.5 mile run and visited a friend and put my baby down for a nap. And while he dreams dreams that I can only imagine, I exhale.
But there's something else. I'm feeling victorious. I'm feeling like a pro-mom. My child is napping. In his crib, nonetheless. And I have time to think and write and feel like I am doing something right.
That's when it hits me. R.I.G.H.T. This word haunts me - as a woman and a mother. I've spent the better part of 28 years always trying to do the right thing, the best thing, the thing that will result in the most favorable outcome. That thing that, when I tell other people or look back on it myself, I'll think, "yup, I succeeded. I did it the right way." As a woman, I think about whether it's the right time to look for a job, to cut my hair, to buy a house. As a mother? Ohmeohmy. The list could be endless!
Most recently, I've been figuring out the right way I should get my child to sleep (both day and night). Do I push a routine? or let read his cues and just go with it? Do I lay him in his crib awake? or rock him to sleep? Do I not respond if he wakes up within an hour of going down for a nap? or will not responding land my adult-child in the therapy chair (ha)?
No matter what I do, when he sleeps, I feel victorious. I did something R.I.G.H.T. When he doesn't sleep? You guessed it - I can taste failure. And it tastes like disappointment + desperation + gravel.
I realize this issue of R.I.G.H.T.ness is not really about sleep. Or about schedules. Or my son.
Narcissistically, it's all about me. About my tendency to need validation, to succeed (at what?), to wrap things up in nice little bows. Because when I feel validated and successful and have a nice little bow? I feel victorious. I feel quiet and still.
And I can ignore the chaos that is being a woman and a mother.
But there's something else. I'm feeling victorious. I'm feeling like a pro-mom. My child is napping. In his crib, nonetheless. And I have time to think and write and feel like I am doing something right.
That's when it hits me. R.I.G.H.T. This word haunts me - as a woman and a mother. I've spent the better part of 28 years always trying to do the right thing, the best thing, the thing that will result in the most favorable outcome. That thing that, when I tell other people or look back on it myself, I'll think, "yup, I succeeded. I did it the right way." As a woman, I think about whether it's the right time to look for a job, to cut my hair, to buy a house. As a mother? Ohmeohmy. The list could be endless!
Most recently, I've been figuring out the right way I should get my child to sleep (both day and night). Do I push a routine? or let read his cues and just go with it? Do I lay him in his crib awake? or rock him to sleep? Do I not respond if he wakes up within an hour of going down for a nap? or will not responding land my adult-child in the therapy chair (ha)?
No matter what I do, when he sleeps, I feel victorious. I did something R.I.G.H.T. When he doesn't sleep? You guessed it - I can taste failure. And it tastes like disappointment + desperation + gravel.
I realize this issue of R.I.G.H.T.ness is not really about sleep. Or about schedules. Or my son.
Narcissistically, it's all about me. About my tendency to need validation, to succeed (at what?), to wrap things up in nice little bows. Because when I feel validated and successful and have a nice little bow? I feel victorious. I feel quiet and still.
And I can ignore the chaos that is being a woman and a mother.
19 February 2011
More effort
It's starting to take many more toys to keep the little man entertained during my morning runs. Yesterday?
1. Rings
2. Ducky ball
3. Fabric block
4. Burp cloth
5. Rattle elephant
6. Fingers
And still? He only lasted 25 minutes. The good news about that is I'm forced to up my speed to get the distance I want to accomplish and will soon be running 7 minute miles...ha. Ha ha ha. Friends, I haven't ran a 7 minute mile ever.
Ah well, soon the weather will warm and we will be braving the outdoor run-while-pushing-a-baby-in-a-stroller-while-trying-not-to-get-hit-by-cars-and-avoiding-potholes-the-size-of-Texas.
17 February 2011
Thankful Thursday
For warm sunshine
For 8 hours of sleep (in a row)
For coffee
For running
For cardigans
For 8 hours of sleep (in a row)
For coffee
For running
For cardigans
14 February 2011
In honor of the day
Given that it's Valentine's Day and all, I figured this would be the perfect time to share this video. This is proof that we have a little heartbreaker on our hands. (Please excuse the 4 mom's in the background being silly and the shaky video is due to my own laughter that I couldn't contain.)
Teddy is a flirt, it's true. Or maybe he's just a happy baby and smiles at everyone...or maybe he's a flirt.
Here is more photographic evidence from the scene of the crime.
(P.S. These are the only somewhat clear pics I have, and, as Teddy will tell you, we had them sitting on our couch for a solid 5 minutes. Capturing mobile infants is challenging!)
(P.P.S. You may notice Teddy is the only one not wearing socks. This is a result of his desire to make fire with his feet by violently rubbing them together, thus literally flinging socks off and across the room at times. On that particular day, I just gave up.)
Happy Valentine's Day!
Ladies Man from M Aiello on Vimeo.
Teddy is a flirt, it's true. Or maybe he's just a happy baby and smiles at everyone...or maybe he's a flirt.
Here is more photographic evidence from the scene of the crime.
(P.S. These are the only somewhat clear pics I have, and, as Teddy will tell you, we had them sitting on our couch for a solid 5 minutes. Capturing mobile infants is challenging!)(P.P.S. You may notice Teddy is the only one not wearing socks. This is a result of his desire to make fire with his feet by violently rubbing them together, thus literally flinging socks off and across the room at times. On that particular day, I just gave up.)
Happy Valentine's Day!
09 February 2011
07 February 2011
04 February 2011
Dear Teddy
Happy 4 month birthday, little man! I can't believe it has been 4 whole months that you've been an outside baby. This month has brought so many fun developments - you laugh and giggle every day now; you screech like it's the only noise you can make; you prefer to be upright, either sitting or standing; you are enthralled with watching Dad and I eat and drink; you can finally reach your toes and have tickled your own feet a few times; you bring everything directly to your mouth. In short, you are a bonafide baby now, exploring your world with all senses and testing out lots of new skills.
This month has been busy for our little family, as well. I was offered a job, but decided not to take it. There were a few reasons, including my desire to continue to be with you all day. We're getting into a little groove, you and I, and I wasn't ready to shake that up yet. Also, Dad and I are looking into buying a house for you and any future siblings. It has been a stressful process so far, but it has got me thinking about what home means.
I found myself laying in bed the other night (or was it the morning?) thinking about house showings and list prices and taxes and square footage. And I imagined our little family in all these different spaces - how would it feel to live in that 3-story light blue house with the pool? or the stone-clad ranch with the attic playroom? Which one would most be our home?
I was overcome with a funny feeling I've read about before. Dad was sleeping soundly next to me and you were steps away in your crib, and I felt at home already. "Home is where the heart is," the famous sentiment goes. My heart is with Dad and with you, and so I am always home when the three of us are together. The four walls we end up buying? I'm sure they will matter to some degree - they will contain future Christmas mornings and birthday parties and lazy Sunday cook-outs.
But this, the 4th month of your life, I've finally learned a most important lesson: Love makes a house a home. With so much love between the three of us, any four walls will do. (As long as there is a functional bathroom and a small patch of grass for you to play in the mud.)
Love,
Mom
03 February 2011
Thankful Thursday
For blue skies and sunshine
For fresh ravioli
For vodka-tonics
For napping babies
For sweatpants
(in no particular order)
For fresh ravioli
For vodka-tonics
For napping babies
For sweatpants
(in no particular order)
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